Good and bad days gone by...

Yay, baack to posting! At this moment I am having a wonderful dinner/snack of maple brown sugar oatmeal with 3 TJ's Dark Chocoalate covered almonds stirred in with a 1/2 tbsp almond butter also! MMMMH! Eventually I am going to come across one of the chocolateless almonds, the chocolate all melted off! :)

My title is how its been. Today has been great, but the previous two were awful. I am not letting it destroy the progress I have made so far tho!!! Infact, even tho it was terrible, (I am btw tallking about food stuff) it just made me realize how badly I NEED to recover. The last two days have been hell, just hell, as far as my eating has gone, but I have come through stronger, and also knowing that I cant do what i did again or else it WILL destroy my previous efforts. This time tho,it was the first and last time, and I will not look back and let it ruin my progress. And besides, out of 6 days of my new plan, its been 4 good days to 2 bad, so over all I have been doing better then not! :)

Ok, omg, back to what I am enjoying, it is seriously like desert but better because its not tooo sweet(i dont really like sweet that much) and its oatmeal, so of course its good! :D LOVE!

Overall it seems like things are looking more positive then not. I never got to post about my last T appt. but it was good, and the next one I am having my mom and dad come in with me so we can all talk. I am trying to be brave, but I am afraid i am going to change my mind when I get there. Hopefully with my T's help I will be able to do it. We just seriously all need to talk because if things at home dont get better(really, they suck) I am not gonna last. Either I would fall back into my old ways, making things worse, or I would seriously consider running away, or just living with another family, which I am sure that if I really wanted to my parents would let me!! So ah, its still more than a week away, but I am anxiously awaiting it...The past week I have just been trying super hard to help out around here and stay on my parents good side(not really working, they yell at me for everything!). But I am trying so hard, I dont want everything to fall apart because even if it isnt my fault I so often take the failure out on myself.

School hasnt been too unbearable, I just have one more day till break! EEK, I am excited!! And tomorrow hardly even counts because I leave at 9 to take the compass test, then its art for the last 3 periods, which I think I might skip....I love doing art, but I dont like Mrs. Noyds art studio!! And 3 hours of drawing pears with pastels??? NO THANKYOU! So ya, just proverbs memorization test tomorrow, which I am not ready for, but no worries, I will be!

Heres some pics then I'm off to draw, study, and hopefully take a quick walk! :)

my nail art! :) I kove doing my nails all fancy, and haha, i used black, even tho its against school policy. I use a skewer for the flowers. Love it, they are in honor of spring! :D

my completely vintage heart earings. Random, I know, but I love em! :D My aunt gave them to me because she never wore them. Honestly when I first got them I didnt think I would either! ;)

Chocolate brownie z-bar spread with a 1/2 tbsp almond butter and 1/2 a apple! :)

The very first picture is one i drew with side walk chalk in the driveway yesterday. Unfortunately I was playing around with effects and accidentaly saved it, thats why its kinda weird looking! ;)

Dinner tonight, lol, ya, its now 3 hours later, was so good! I left my camera at school today tho. :( It was a toasted english muffin with a tbsp PB and shredded half carrot and spinach all sandwhiched together! Also a bit of cranberrie juice on the side! :) I love being creative and artistic with food! :)

What is one of your favorite things that you do all by yourself??

Maddi

xxx